I Remember...

When I was younger I used to use my dad's nice felt tip pens to draw with. He would bring home giant piles of that printer paper with the little holes down the edges and I would be instructed to use pencil but I stole the felt tip pens every time. He bought them to do work with or math or whatever the hell it was he did. But no, I would take them from the jar of pens and use them to draw foxes and unicorns and mermaids and girls with different fashionable dresses (read: slutty clothing).

I remember that the red and black markers were always out of ink but the brown markers were always great. There was a reason for that. Now I would use any of them if it was just pouring ink, I like how smooth it is and what a nice line it makes. Back then I thought brown was a yucky color. I remember how when I drew women and mermaids with cleavage, my dad would ask why there was a "worm crawling up her chest" and how I'd get annoyed when he said what a beautiful drawing my sister had made and how she must be the artist of the house when I had just given her a drawing lesson.

I'd get irritated at those silly coloring contests they'd give kids around Easter or the xeroxed pages of Bozo the clown. I'd color it in perfectly and would get nothing. it was the kid who scrawled green all over the clown's face and made the sky purple that won. I meticulously colored inside the lines and made everything the correct color. maybe they thought my parents did if for me. ::sniff:: In talking about clowns right now I just went online looking for some and found this guy, who seems pretty cool and young. A graduate of a clown college, wtf? I should be one to know there's a college for everything out there. I like the thought of a vaudevillian act.

Speaking of clowns, my aunt dressed up as one for my fifth birthday party. I don't know how, but I didn't realize it was her until my mom told me 3 years later. She honestly looked more like a ghoul in a clown costume because she painted her face white and then made big black patches around her eyes. She had a bucket full of confetti and it was pretty funny because she scared the shit out of my mom by going into the kitchen, turning on the faucet, and then coming out and acting like the bucket was heavy and subsequently spilling the confetti everywhere. My sister was already crying because my aunt looked scary and because my sister cried at fucking everything. It was a success, all in all, and for no money, at that.

My sister cried when she got bumped out of her seat playing musical chairs at my 6th birthday party. My sister cried when Brandon spilled his orange soda on her lap at my 7th birthday party. My sister cried when my parents hired a big yellow chicken to accost my aunt at her 28th birthday party. My sister cried at our kiddie Halloween party for reasons that I can't remember. My sister cried when we jumped off the stairs into the snowpile on the bush and her leg went through into the bush and she couldn't get up. My sister cried when my parents let her up into the attic with me and my mom and she realized the attic is significantly higher than the floor and she wailed "Diddyyyyyyyy" at my dad. My sister cried at everything. She probaby cried in some episode with a mall santa like every other kid on the planet but I can't specifically remember that.

Well that post veered off in another direction, eh?